[December] Downe Girls - Momo and Jamie

Interviewing one person is hard enough, but two people who are together, is somewhat of a challenge. I never know how the dynamics of the relationship is going to be and where I fit in. My fear is sitting in that unmistakable tension of two people who don't really like each other and don't know it yet.

All of my cynicism aside, I can honestly say that Momo and Jamie are two people who genuinely enjoy each other's company. They are polite, making sure not to interrupt the other and always smiling at each other between questions. From our brief meeting, they seem like the kind of couple you'd want to invite over for dinner just because it's so nice to have them around.

Momo and Jamie met over a year ago while working at the theaters together. They hit it off instantly, exchanging text messages and flirty sideway glances soon after. "She made me feel like a different person," Momo says, with such dreamy optimism that I feel like I'm a teenager again.

While Momo had dated girls in the past, Jamie had to wrestle with her sexuality and unfamiliar feelings for Momo. "I have a lot of gay friends," Jamie says, "so it was never something I was uncomfortable with. I was always open to it. But I never thought I'd meet someone. But when I met her [Momo], I just knew it was different. We told each other like the day after meeting that we had crushes on each other--it was weird." Jamie smiles and then turns to look at Momo. It's cute to watch them wait for each other's reactions.

Jamie continues, "It wasn't awkward at all. She made me feel so comfortable, so I didn't have anything to be weirded out about. It was just...natural." They both look at each other again and then sort of laugh, as if sharing an inside joke.

So then I ask the question that most gay and lesbian couples have to deal with: does you family know?

Momo pauses and sort of shakes her head before she answers. "I didn't decide to come out to them [my family] until after things were final with me and my ex breaking up. We were living together and I didn't know what to do after we broke up. That's when I decided to come out to my Mom. So the whole time in high school, I was in the closet and I didn't want anyone to know. I knew my parents would be comfortable about it, so I don't know why I wasn't comfortable with it. I told hre and she was super accepting. She even told me she had experiences too, wihch was super awkward! But yaeh, it was a tearful moment." Instinctively, Jamie reaches for Momo's hand before she continues. "My dad passed away in 2006, so I never got a chance to tell him and I really wish I did 'cause I know he would accept it. I have a big family and they all know. They love me--they were like, 'why didn't you tell us earlier?' They love Jamie, even more than they love me! So they've been really accepting and I think I'm a different person now because of that."

The three of us joke around a bit to lighten the mood, but there's stlil more to be said. "It was so hard for me in high school," Momo exlpains. "The school I went to was super small and nobody was really gay there. I mean, they were gay, but they didn't say anything because everybody was against it. I think they had an idea about me and my ex-girlfriend, so they would call me 'butchie' or some other names. It made me not want to come out to family."

I want to tell Momo that she's not alone in her high school experiences, but without missing a beat, Jamie rubs her shoulder lovingly. The more I talk to both of them, the more I realize how much their stories sound like the ones I've heard and told.

"I told my parents two months after we met," Jamie begins. "My mom told me if I didn't break up with her, I had to move out. She always makes remarks to me about being with her [Momo]. She used to say stuff to me before and it bothered me, but I mean, she can't change what I want to do with my life. I don't understand why she can't accept it? My dad, though, we've never talked about it and he's never come to me. But I think he's more accepting of it because he told my mom that if I want to be with her, she can't do anything about it."

Sometimes, I think, in our quest to find ourselves we forget how there are others who also share our stories. My conversation with Momo and Jamie remind me that our life experiences can be communal and therapeutic.

After the formal interview, I snap a few pictures for the article. I can tell they're nervous and want to know how they should pose. I don't give them much direction and just start snapping away. Somewhere in the middle of the set, they finally relax and I get a picture of them looking at each other in mid-laugh.